It's really an amazing thing to write your memoirs from a place of peace. I have tried so many times to write in the past, and only became frustrated and depressed by my own story. I have had time to heal, to see my experiences as just that...experiences. There is no blame, no finger pointing...just me and the people I have spent my life with. I am now able to write about these events as an observer, not as a victim or an innocent bi-stander. Amazingly, the memories are clearer from that stand-point as well. My friend Bette (who is also writing her memoirs) was telling me the same thing the other day, she said, "I can see the paint on the walls and the color of the tile in the kitchen" as if it happened yesterday. We are ready. We are ready to look at our past and not only face it, but write about it, and explain our journey to others without anger, and with peace in our hearts.
I had an epiphany after writing about my childhood in chapter 2 yesterday. I was writing about my brother and I playing "runaways" when we were kids. This was my favorite game to play. All I wanted to do was run away from home and create my own world, my own place, and live off of whatever meager allowances I could find. It was a fantasy for years...and I realized I was STILL playing out that fantasy. My dream actually came true. I left my second marriage, I took off, bought my own house on MY terms, quit my job and started working at home and making my dreams come true in anyway I could. The pitfall was that I clinging to the challenge of living meagerly. I have loved this game from the time I was 6 years old, and I am still playing it. Ironically, I also want to live my life with "faith"...faith that God will provide. Well, the only way for that to come true is if I have NOTHING and God provides. Am I right? Well, my subconscious is playing it out that way. Yep. I discovered something really amazing about myself yesterday, and I realize that I can overcome my current obstacles by being CONSCIOUS of my thought patterns.
I am allowed to be successful without struggling and scraping and "surviving". It is okay to thrive. It is okay to have plenty. I am allowed to have an abundant life.
I had an epiphany after writing about my childhood in chapter 2 yesterday. I was writing about my brother and I playing "runaways" when we were kids. This was my favorite game to play. All I wanted to do was run away from home and create my own world, my own place, and live off of whatever meager allowances I could find. It was a fantasy for years...and I realized I was STILL playing out that fantasy. My dream actually came true. I left my second marriage, I took off, bought my own house on MY terms, quit my job and started working at home and making my dreams come true in anyway I could. The pitfall was that I clinging to the challenge of living meagerly. I have loved this game from the time I was 6 years old, and I am still playing it. Ironically, I also want to live my life with "faith"...faith that God will provide. Well, the only way for that to come true is if I have NOTHING and God provides. Am I right? Well, my subconscious is playing it out that way. Yep. I discovered something really amazing about myself yesterday, and I realize that I can overcome my current obstacles by being CONSCIOUS of my thought patterns.
I am allowed to be successful without struggling and scraping and "surviving". It is okay to thrive. It is okay to have plenty. I am allowed to have an abundant life.
4 comments:
I have chills on my arms and my tiny blonde hairs are standing up, trying to read what you've written. *Brushing them back down* Your post makes so much sense. I sometimes feel that if I have money and things that I'm not living a Godly life. HOWEVER, God wants us to be prosperous! God looks favorable on those with their own businesses! And thank you so much for the recommendation that you gave me. I'm returning the favor.. thankfully, it's easy to do because I truly love your blog! You're an awesome and talented person!
You are absolutely right. We need to know and act like we deserve to have abundance!
Excellent post. The concept of "writing from a place of peace" captures an essence of enlightment.
I have a piece about "Writing as Therapy" on my own blog. If you have time, do drop by to take a peek at http://ellentaliaferro.com/2008/01/27/writing-as-therapy/
Also, I am always looking for contributions to this blog is you or your readers want to contribute something more about writing as a way of healing.
Thanks. And keep writing!
DrT
You are so right and this write is excellent. Many times people think that if they have material things and live a good life with some extra cash to spend, that they arent serving God or he wont help them. God wants us to rejoice in life and to live a good life. We can serve him no matter where we are at in our lives emotionally and finacially. I enjoyed this very much. Thank you for sharing it. Always, Darrel
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